trying not to let myself wallow in self-pity

i just realise something.. it's so hard to get out of disappointment and hurt, but it's much easier to switch from a happy day/occasion into gloomy/sour day.. i dont want that to be true for me..

sigh, i feel like i may be trying too hard to keep my friends.. i have this fear that i lose my friends or i lose that closeness with them because of who i am.. or that i just dont have an attractive or rather good enough character or personality for them to see me as someone they would want to be close with.. i dont want keep thinking that i cant do anything about.. if it's character then i want to build it.. i'm not gonna let this get me down..

gonna keep smiling =)

i've got 'Forever reign' stuck in my head..

hmm so it's been really long since i updated.. things were really busy lately.. so what have i been up to?
1. i worked in IMU for about a week
2. started my 3rd semester (which is kinda a killer sem)
3. danced and 'catwalked' for orientation
4. plan an illustration with jas for Jcworks for one sunday
5. help with prep for chris and angel's wedding =D
6. spent time with some very special people =) (am so glad you guys are back!)

yeah so anyways this semester is really tough.. have been trying to plan and strategise so i wont end up failing any papers and i am determine to either maintain my CGPA or increase it! yes so i am going to excel in this semester despite it being difficult! and i know i have Jesus so that's my comfort =D

sigh, part of me wants to quickly finish this course, because i know what's waiting for me when i finish my studies.. and yet i want to enjoy this moment in my life being with my friends in uni and enjoying the life of a student and being young and free from certain responsibilities yet.. i count the days to when i'm done but i feel so reluctant to let this go yet.. i wonder too whether i could be a good dietitian/nutritionist.. i would want to be the best at what i do so i dont wanna disappoint myself at all..

pics from the finale night in which i catwalked.. it was themed masquerade

two days before the finale. this was variety night. we danced that night =)

our N&D lab =) where we cook! =D

starting anew to start anew (title contributed by jian shen)

is it alright to be irritated at what one might deem as something small? sigh, because i really am irritated right now.. i told myself, Just ignore it.. guess it's funny when it's not you huh? and you dont exactly have the right to tell that person off because sometimes, lets admit it, we do some things for humour at the expense of others.. i'll let this experience remind me to be more mindful of others the next time i think of doing something funny at the someone else's expense..

on another note, i realise i shouldnt say 'crap' anymore so i'm not going to.. if you ever hear that word escape my lips, please pinch me =)


so what have i been up to now that exams are over? well, i've been back at uni practicing for a dance we're gonna perform for orientation.. it's been the most tiring days these past few days.. and man, do my muscles ache! oooh! but it was so gratifying =D we manage to finish getting the choreography all on our own within two days and today, we were able to sync all the girls so that was pretty awesome =) i think we're getting there =) i have faith in my groupmates and we make a good group.. hahahha you should hear the amount of laughter that comes from the dance room when we get together =) OH OH!!! and i must tell you.. i managed to do a handstand!! hahahha well for like a second BUT STILL!!! it was the awesomest thing ever!!! you're probably wondering why i need to do a handstand.. so, becuase i'm too lazy to post up the vid of the dance we're doing, i'll give you this link =)

OH OH OH!!! and i recently joined cheerleading (dont judge me!) and i manage to 'fly'!!! hahahah in other  words i became the flyer =D hahahha it was the most nerve-wrecking, heart-stopping, on-top-of-the-world feeling ever! period. hahahahah and jess and mun teng managed to 'fly' too!! it's so great to be able to share such an experience with them =) aaahh..

this is the 'elavator'. we did this one =)

a new skin!

i finally decided on a new look =)

tadaa!!!

anyways, just thought i'd post up some craftsy stuff i made not too long ago =)

some were made waay back, like a few months ago.. some made few weeks ago =)

different

was just browsing through channels on the telly when i came across Jamie Cullum's version of Rihanna's Don't Stop the Music.

it's definitely different from the usual electronic beats.

have yet to decide whether i like it better than the original one or not since i'm not really a big fan of Jamie Cullum's voice. but neither do i find Rihanna's voice a pleasure to my ears.

what do you think?

=D

laughter!

wow.. reading everyone's blog with their inspiring posts makes me feel like i'm just rambling empty words on mine..

anyways, finals are in two weeks.. decided to take a break from the mundane studying..

i've just been thinking to myself that i'm so blessed to have found GREAT friends from church and outside of it.. 

honestly there have been some occasions where i feel pressured to come up with something REALLY funny because i want to see the people around me laugh and laugh with them.. [hahahah unfortunately, i'm not that good at coming up with something REALLY funny.. these days i like to just listen to people talk and observe them =)] but in uni, hahaha we laugh at things that aren't funny, things not said or things not shown.. sometimes we laugh at each other and ourselves.. we even laugh when some of us dont find it funny at all.. just seeing how the other person laughs is enough to trigger our giggles.. hahaha i love it that we laugh over the smallest thing just because we're all easily amused =) yes, it's true.. i am a laughing mess when i'm at uni.. heee =D

and it's not to say that i dont enjoy myself when i'm out of my circle of uni mates.. i do =D it's so interesting that i experience a variety of emotions when i'm with different groups of people. and i like it!

so Jess, Mun Teng, Li Chin, Cheryl, Wai Sum and Kar Wei, this is for you guys, for all the laughter shared! i hope we'll still be able to laugh like that when we've reached our higher semesters =) i love you guys!

i absolutely love this version

hahaha just watch the expression of the guy playing the guitar when he saw Celine Dion.. priceless ahahhaha =)