Barely awake.... zzzzz

leaders retreat was... hmm hard to put into words but the experience was not what i had expected, but who says i'm complaining? i laughed alot, got to know more leaders, swam quite a bit, played hello jack till i got quite sick of that game, had very lil sleep, cried till my eyes became sepet, learnt new games, realised that i cannot shoot hoops for nuts, forgot the take photos, however i did pose for some =), missed belle lots, wished rose happy birthday and looked on with full amusement as the leaders sabo-ed her with who knows what(shaving cream i think.. poor rose), and last but not least... SHARED A TINY BATHROOM WITH 40 GIRLS in my dorm o.O!! guess that was the icing on the cake! ahahaha all in all it was a real eye-opener to what the leadership team of YC is like... and i can tell with no fingers crossed that i love what i've seen! and i cant believe i'm a part of this wonderful team. actually i can ahaha but anyhow you get the picture... the memories i take back with me from rawang will stick with me for as long as i can remember (eeyer sound so composition/essay-like >.<)

very sleepy now cause i only had five hours or so of sleep and i have hw to do and school to go to tomorrow... so this sleepy child shall log off now and pack her bag and go to bed (she doesnt care for hw at this point cause she's too tired and knows that she can do it tomorrow *bluek*)

FICTION

Never before had I seen anything like it. The colour… the material… it was everything I ever wanted, and more. The elegance of the ruffles, and the way it wrapped itself around the mannequin, hugging it; it was a picture of perfection. I stood staring at it through the glass pane. I was enchanted. It was a masterpiece.

Then, I heard it. It was calling out to me, enticing me, and practically begging me to try it on. I felt my legs carry me through the glass doors and my eyes scanning the room for that one thing that had now caught my full attention.

There it was, right in the middle of the room. I was so drawn in by its beauty; I completely ignored the stares of the salesgirls. All I could think of was getting to that rack. As my fingers discovered the layers and layers of soft silky fabric, my eyes caught sight of two words: fitting room.

I stepped into a room with three full length mirrors, carefully closing the polished door behind me. I gingerly slipped into the gown fit for a goddess. I turned to face the mirrors, my eyes drinking in the sight of my reflection. From the neckline right down to the hemline, it fitted me perfectly. I was ecstatic, lost in my own realm of fantasy. I slowly moved from side to side watching as the lower part of the gown sashayed from left to right.

“Oh, how it accentuates my curves and how wonderfully delicious it looks on me!” I sighed to myself. I just had to have it.

Reluctantly, I unzipped the back of the dress. My hand caught hold of something squarish, a tag. I inhaled sharply as this could only mean one thing. “The price tag. It must cost a bomb!“ I thought to myself. Slowly, I flipped the tag over. My heart dropped right down to my feet as my eyes rested on the five digit number that seemed to be glaring back at me.

“Silly girl! Why oh why did I try it on?” I blamed myself bitterly for the predicament I was now in. I could never be able to afford it. I needed to get out of there, fast. I quickly put on my faded blouse and slipped back into my old, torn jeans. I left the store immediately. I did not want to be reminded of how I could not have all the pretty little things that I longed for. Streams of tears flowed as I recalled the arrogant eyes that bore right through me as I was leaving that place. That night, I was fighting a battle. A battle that raged on in my mind…

“How could I ever come up with enough money to buy that exquisite gown? All the money I had was used up for my education. Ooh, I am so frustrated, no, tormented rather, that I cannot get what I now desire above all else.”

The vision of the queen-like gown was so still clear; I could almost reach out and run my fingers through its delicate cloth all over again. I remembered how gorgeous it looked. The gown seemed to have every single colour I could imagine of, like those of a rainbow. Yet it looked bewitchingly beautiful, not tacky like some other gowns would. I had always dreamed of owning something of beauty and perfection. Now that I had found it, would I ever own it? I just had to have it.

“I can’t possibly borrow ten thousand dollars from mom or anyone else for that matter and neither can I work to buy it for it would take me years to cough out that outrageous amount. Unless… I… No! It’s absurd! What was I thinking? I would never stoop so low as to do something like that just to for a gown. Even if it is everything that I wanted… Would I? Or in this case, could I?” I was starting to sound more like a lunatic rather than a sane individual in a dilemma.

The sun took its first peek into the morning sky. The battle was won and my mind was made up. I’d do anything so long as I could have my one dream and desire. My obsession.

The piercing sound of an electronic beeper rang throughout the mall. “Drat, technology these days…” I muttered to myself as I hastily made a dash for the glass doors. I had tried not to leave any details to chance. Unfortunately, I had forgotten the most important thing, the alarms. I zigzagged through the crowd in hopes of shaking off the security guards. I threw a quick glance over my shoulder before ducking into the toilet. I hid in one of the cubicles, panting heavily.

“What have I gotten myself into? Dishonoring my family for this… gown?” I had to spit out the last word. Reality hit like a splash of icy cold water on my face.

Suddenly, there was a loud rap on the door. “Come out of the cubicle slowly with your hands in the air!” commanded a stern, female voice. My mind was in a state of frenzy.

“Was this really worth it?” I queried aloud as I looked down at the one thing that had destroyed my future, my life. “I said, come out slowly with your hands in the air!” came the voice again, this time with a hint of impatience. Time was running out, and I was contemplating every single option. I inhaled sharply at the sudden realization, I had none. Shutting my eyes tight, I took a deep breath and lifted the slinky metal device from my bag. Slowly but surely, I squeezed the trigger.

note: this is purely fiction =) dont think i'd do ANYTHING for pieces of cloth sewn together.. even if i look like a goddess in it hahaha.. i wrote it for and exam and later for a newsletter which it never got to the editor.. sigh, oh well..

This new year!

i love this new year! it's been most hmm fun/encouraging/entertaining.. oh i dunno, i mean i've just been enjoying myself thoroughly =)))))) there are many things i've realised that's gonna take place this new year.


belle and her family will be leaving for US this year. the more i think about it, the more my heart breaks. i love her sooooo much! she's one rocking babe and she's like this whirlwind the has completely turn my world upside down. she's changed me and encouraged to to get closer to God than i've ever been. she's just pure heaven-sent. i dread the day i'll have to send her off to the airport. i just wanna spend as much time as i can with her before she leaves. i wanna make happy and sweet memories of her. i wanna capture our every moment together. i'll miss the sundays where we'd sit together, the three of us (hang, belle and i). i'll miss cg time where the three of us would make the most noise just talking bout nonsense =). but most of all, i'll miss the times where she'd call me just to say hi or to tell me she's gone fatter (which is pure absurdity) or to simply to talk to when she's got something on her mind. belle's no superhuman, she doesnt have a mind of a genius but she's a wonderful person who loves God so so so much, with all her heart. and i think that's just the recipe for a great character.

there's many more things i wanna say bout this year's events however, time does not permit me to do so... i shall probably continue when i have the willpower to sit down and blog =))))) hahahahaha... hurray church tomo!! cant wait to see everyone again... cheers mates! to a better and more exciting year ahead!!